How to Get a Date
Perhaps the most stressful part of dating is arranging a date in the first place. The fear of rejection makes asking someone out seem like a daunting task. Thankfully, the modern technology in this day and age opens a few loopholes to help reduce or avoid this fear of rejection.
Here are a few tips for getting a date:
1. Keep it simple and casual. Asking someone out doesn’t have to be a huge ordeal. You don’t have to spend hours practicing some line in front of a mirror. It can be done in stages. Get their number, talk or text with them a couple times, mention some idea you have and ask them if they’d like to join you. It is only as stressful or frightening as you make it.
2. Use online dating. Personally, I’m not a huge fan of online dating. I like the more old school approach of meeting people “in real life” and getting to know them that way and I feel like the caliber of people using online dating sites is generally slightly below the ideal standard for dating material. However, it’s hard to deny that online dating is a super-efficient way to get a date. Entire books could be written about how to successfully use online dating sites. I’m not going to dive into the specifics of that in this article, but in general, send an email (that “winking” crap is really lame), say something funny, correspond a couple of times, and if there seems to be interest, ask them out. The fear of rejection is almost entirely taken out of the equation with online dating, so don’t beat around the bush too much. If there seems to be even the slightest level of rapport, don’t be afraid to ask the person out.
3. Leverage friendships into getting dates. Usually if you are a friendly person who knows a lot of people, the dates kind of fall into place on their own. This is probably the most effortless way to go about getting a date. Just be friendly, be social, and do stuff with people. Chances are, you’ll wind up encountering someone of the opposite sex along the way and dating that person will kind of naturally follow.
4. Text message. I love, love, love using text messaging as a bridge to getting a date. When you meet someone, you don’t have to ask them out on a date, just get their number. Once you have their number, you can flirt with them via text. Texting is such a non-invasive way to communicate with someone. It’s completely standard for the other person to respond an hour or two later. All of the pressure and intensity is removed. It also serves as a great way to find out how interested the other person is without having to put a bunch of social pride at risk. Texting is just a fun, casual way to flirt with someone. Once the rapport is there, ask them to meet you somewhere for a drink.
5. Don’t try to date co-workers. It can seem incredibly tempting to try to date co-workers. After all, you’re around them more than you are most people, so why not use them as dating material too? As logical as that seems, dating co-workers usually has a super-messy turnout. It can ruin any level of professionalism you have at your job. The rumors and innuendos that fly around workplaces when two peers are dating each other can be very damaging. Additionally, if things were to get serious with the person, you’ll find yourself never having the chance to get a break from them. Even if you’re crazy about someone, you’ll still want some degree of separation from them in your day-to-day life.